how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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