What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
