I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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