didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
dude i'm inner monologue high
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
