we have officially lost it.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
