census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
