she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
