I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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