how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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