; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
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