Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
