i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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