So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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