just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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