It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
