marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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