He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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