Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
