Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Randomize
