the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Success! We fucked roommates!
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
