have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
