Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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