i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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