She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Randomize
