everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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