When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Randomize
