i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Randomize
