They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I just had sex on a roof
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
