there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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