Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My vagina just recognized that song.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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