You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
