What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean