Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
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under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
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I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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