Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
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