That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
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If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
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Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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