clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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