dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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