If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize