how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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