If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
