hotel room ftw
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
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he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
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Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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