I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
