pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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