found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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