i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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