everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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