Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
