We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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