"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
