like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
not ubering you a puppy
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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