y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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