I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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