Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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